Seriously?

The new Blu-ray player was the best place you could think of to warm up your PB&J?

I guess the allure of the tray popping out was too much for you, and easily drowned out my telling you repeatedly "don't touch the blu-ray player", "don't touch any of daddies toys", "don't touch anything".

I want to beat you but Mommy and I decided before you were born that we would never do that - but my God is it tempting.

What did I do in a past life to deserve this?

I hate my kid.